Preserving Friendships With Positive Thoughts
There are two Mitzvos that work together to help us perfect our interpersonal relationships. The first Mitzvah is "Love your friend like you love yourself," and the second, "Judge your friend favorably." We fulfill "Love your friend as you love yourself," by doing good deeds for our friend, and feeling for him, when he experiences bad times or good. "Judge your friend favorably" applies to a situation where your friend did something to you which can be viewed positively or negatively. This Mitzvah instructs in such a case, to always judge him positively. If we follow human nature and assume that his action was negative, we will no longer have capacity to love him fully.
Lesson: When we "Love our friends as we love ourself" and always "judge them favorably," our relationships will be positive, vibrant, and loving.
App: Imagine you invite a friend to a Simchah and he doesn't attend. Initially, you feel slighted that he didn't show up, and think "he's not really a friend." Then you remember it is Mitzvah to judge your friend favorably. You think, "Maybe he had previous plans. Maybe he wanted to come but something came up in the last minute. Maybe he wasn't feeling well." By turning to positive thoughts, you preserve your own peace of mind and keep your good relationship with a cherished friend.
(Based on Yesod V"Shoresh HaAvodah)
