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The Joy of Repentance\Guilt-Free
Based on Tomer Devorah by the Holy Ramak
Authored and Published by the Salant Foundation
Distributed by Feldheim
Good Till the End!
אַל תַּחְשֹׁב מִפְּנֵי שֶׁאַתָּה מִצַּד הָרַע שֶּׁאֵין לְךָ תַּקָּנָה, זֶה שֶׁקֶר.
(13) [God conveyed to Kayin], ’Do not think that since you derive from the side of Evil there is no rectification for you - this is falsehood!’
He’s Lying to You!
The Ramak enlightens us with a precious insight! After Kayin’s offering was rejected, the Negative Impulse flooded him with toxic thoughts until he considered himself to be irredeemably evil. It is truly a relentless challenge to contend with the “enemy within,” i.e. the Negative Impulse. As our Sages comment on the verse (Tehillim 81:10): “There shall not be found within you a foreign god: This refers to the Negative Impulse, which resides within man” (Shabbos 105b).
The Holy One, Blessed Be He therefore encouraged him to resist this Negative Impulse: “It’s a lie! At its root, all spiritual bitterness is sweet!” Even though Kayin was a Nest of Impurity from the outset of his existence, that was only true regarding his external being. His inner core, however, derived from a holy place that remained pure and accessible.
Till the End!
Indeed, so potent is the soul’s purity that one can still do Teshuvah (Repentance) after a lifetime of transgressing. As we find in the Talmud (Kedushin 40b): “Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai said, ’Even regarding an immoral person who engaged in Teshuvah at the end of his days, we no longer recall his immorality.” Commenting on this passage, Rabbi Nosson states (Kovitz Sichos): “Through his Teshuvah, this person was transformed from an immoral person into a righteous one. Even though he acted immorally for most of his days, nevertheless, he transformed into a righteous person!”
Kayin, however, demurred the inspiration, tragically falling susceptible to the onslaught of self-negativity that “proved” he was irredeemably evil. Believing he had no other path to follow, he was needlessly lost – the paradigm of a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Smoke and Mirrors
If only we could internalize this message: All the Negative Impulse’s power is illusory. And this is so even after it appears to have successfully dragged a person into the gutter – it’s still nothing but a bluff! It’s like a hologram so sophisticated, it would never occur to you to pass your hand through it. From Kayin onward, how many untold multitudes have fallen prey to its pretensions! But like a hologram, if one just realizes it for what it is, he understands he can pass right through it easier than a burning blade through butter.
Our Sages tell us that Avraham our Patriarch was the first person to realize that the Negative Impulse’s power is all an illusion. Realizing that it has no real power whatsoever, Avraham overcame his nature and soared to the most exalted heights of Heavenly Fear and Divine Service. In doing so, he accrued the reward of all those who came before him and failed even to try. Such is the reward of those who hope in the Almighty! When a person is despondent over his spiritual shortcomings, it’s a great challenge not to be swept away by the torrent of toxic messages unleashed by the Negative Impulse. But that is exactly what it wants to happen! And there can be no greater encouragement than for us to realize that in reality we can stand strong, for the Creator endowed us with an eternally holy soul!
Through the miracle of Teshuvah Elyonah (Exalted Repentance), the holiness of Binah (Divine Enlightenment) grants us the ability to discern between our holy soul, which is eternally good and pure; and between our temporal flaws, which are the non-essential aspects of our being. It can be likened to a pearl covered in mud. As soon as the mud is washed away, the stunning jewel is revealed in all its magnificence. So too, our flaws are like shells covering over our holy essence. As soon as the blemishes are removed, the blinding splendor of the soul is revealed.
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